


Hustler and the Ghost Whisperer

by TheExclamation



Category: Lost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-24
Updated: 2013-11-24
Packaged: 2018-01-02 12:51:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1056979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheExclamation/pseuds/TheExclamation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the Flash Sideways - a quick scene from the 80s cop show starring Sawyer & Miles!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hustler and the Ghost Whisperer

**Author's Note:**

> It's never demonstrated in the FS whether or not Miles talks to the dead. I think it makes for a more interesting show if he does.

"Good mornin', Cadbury!"

The man's clothes looked like they'd been slept in. They were a perfect match for his scraggly blonde hair and a five o'clock shadow that looked like it had begun with cocktails at noon. The doorman wanted to get rid of this person as soon as possible, even as he recognised the gentleman (ahem) was going to make it difficult.

"May I help you, Sir?" without too much irony in the last word.

"Why, yes, you can. I have been led to understand that there is a person in your fine establishment who can help me turn some of my possessions into ready cash, if you follow my meanin'."

Translation: He was looking for Freddie The Fence. Of course. "I am afraid that I have no - "

"Now hold it right there; no need to go straight to the bum's rush. I know you probably got an arrangement with him, so how about I skip to the bottom of the page. You probably think I'm a cop, right?"

That, or the other thing. The doorman stayed silent.

"Okay, well, you got me, I'm a cop." And he reached into his pocket, pulling out -

Not a badge, but a black velvet bag. With several items inside, sparkling.

"I'm a cop, with a bag of diamonds stolen from that armoured car yesterday." And he gave the doorman a big shit-eating grin.

The doorman still didn't say anything, but he was finding it more difficult.

"Tell you what, Mona Lisa. You tell me which room Freddie's in, and after my business with him is concluded I'll tell him I never woulda found him without your help, you hear what I'm sayin'?"

*****

"Room 5C."

"And how exactly did you get him to tell you that?"

"Simple," said the Detective with the blonde hair. "I just asked him in which room I could find Freddie The Fence."

"After properly identifying yourself as a police officer first, of course, so he was aware of the risks of incriminating himself."

"Don't sweat it; I followed protocol."

" _You_?"

"I told him I was a cop," the blonde said, pausing for another of his huge insincere grins, "but for some reason I don't think he believed me."

"That's astonishing. Since I'm sure you made every attempt to convince him, including showing him your badge."

"Listen, Jiminy Cricket, do you want to find Freddie, or do you wanna drive me to the church around the block so we can _both_ confess our multitude of sins?"

"Fine, fine. I'm just getting real tired of having to say I Told You So."

They completed the climb to room 5C in silence. A television was playing inside. The blonde Detective drew his weapon and prepared to bang on the door, but his partner shook his head.

"Don't bother."

"Why not?"

"Because the corpse on the other side of this door hit the floor last night just as the eleven o'clock news was coming on."

"Son of a _bitch_!"


End file.
